This will be a very long and personal post, I’m just telling you in advance.
Winter walk by river Isar +this song
It’s very early morning, it’s still dark and quiet outside and I’m laying on my bed with a cup of mint tea near me and writing, surrounded by the strange silence that’s common to this magical time of the day. Now January slowly goes to an end but I still catch myself contemplating about previous year and what do I want for the next year. I don’t really like New Year’s resolution for the same reason I don’t like Valentine’s day- it’s not enough to set your goals once a year as it is not enough to celebrate love once a year. But if you do it often, then these days become only another good opportunity to do what you’re doing anyway. And as I’m doing lots of self-reflection, journalling and goal setting anyway so I tend to use the New Year, too. But this year I didn’t set any real, normal goals. Last year for me was a year of deep change and intensive learning or in some cases unlearning what’s no longer serving me. I moved from Lithuania to Germany, started and finished Marie’s Forleo B-school which changed my worldview profoundly (and understood that it’s actually never finished- the possibilities to implement the knowledge I got from the course and its inspiring community and possibilities to go deeper in each subject are literally endless). I got married, I started to work in new country and culture, travelled, started applying EFT and some other more spiritual tools to remove various blocks I have… 2014 were incredibly useful for my personal and professional growth, but what I notice when I think about it is that it was also a year full of everything- learning, doing, rushing. And I know that now I want some other, more feminine energy in my life to balance this.
So what do I want from this year? Some ideas are continuos or ever-present to me, like craving creativity in everything I do, but this time I want it to be more spontaneous- I notice that when I made photography into my work I started to miss creativity just for the sake of it, in a form of playful, unrestricted experimentation. So I want to experiment with new recipes, get back to occasional painting, decorate my home, write, take images for personal projects… Simply do more things not because I need, but because I feel that I want this particular thing now. What I always notice is that the more you allow yourself this unrestricted self-expression without any specific goal in mind, the more creative you become.
Some ideas are new, like my main core desired feeling now- to be flowing. I know I can do, achieve things I want in masculine way, but I also know it’s quite tiring and not the best way to use my energy, though I use it this way a lot. What I want instead is to focus on my intuition more, feel what’s important now and do things with ease, with harmony and following my inspiration instead of fighting for my goals and pushing through. I want to be like water- soft, flowing, constantly changing, but always finding my way. Flexible, but determined.
I guess if I started with my core desired feelings I should make a short introduction for those who don’t know the concept. There is a book I love by the brilliant Danielle LaPorte called “The desire map” which suggests entirely different option to so popular New Year’s resolutions and other goals (by the way, yesterday I was in self-improvement Meetup in Munich and they said that in Germany according to statistics 92% of people give up on their resolutions in a first month. So maybe we should change something in the way we try to achieve them?). As Danielle says this book is “a guide for creating goals with soul” and I think this description is pretty apt. The whole idea of it is that so often we make our goals having in mind what we’re already doing and what we should logically do next and in this way we are often left not with inspiring goals that move us forward, but with to-do-list that merely creates tension for us. And Danielle (actually Tony Robbins says the same, just in his masculine style) suggest us that what we really desire and crave is to FEEL certain way and that we should create our goals backwards- first understanding how we want to feel each day and just then making our goals that allows us to feel that way. It’s a subtle but profound change in perspective. I’m a huge fan of Danielle’s style and recommend this book if you want to figure out your core desired feelings. Trust me, it helps you live your life in different way.
So, besides creativity and flowing, what are my other current core desired feelings?
Inspiration– I want to feel inspiration everyday, in everything I do. Do things with passion, enthusiasm, love. Be in flow. Feel guided by God and notice and follow the inspiration I get. And be inspiring, helpful to others.
Beauty– be & feel beautiful, create beauty and harmony around me by things I do, words I say and thoughts I think. One idea I knew for long time in theory and I finally want to implement practically is to consciously say/think only positive words about my body. I know we all create our reality with our thoughts, but still I often catch myself saying things about my body that I don’t want to be true. So that’s it, I’m starting an experiment of consciously being kind to my body. That’s where I live and you know what, it’s kind of important.
Connection– to feel connected to higher spirit, to my heart & intuition. To feel connected to nature, spend time there. To feel connected to my love, my family and friends. To build new meaningful relationships and grow them (and current ones) with love, care and helpfulness.
Thriving– the word “successful” doesn’t resonate with me so much, but I do want to succeed in all my efforts, projects and life in general and thriving for me says growing in all areas of life.
Of course you need not only come up with some nice words (though this is already clarity and is therefore good), but you also still need to set goals and now you know what to aim for. I’ll share just few of mine which I feel could help others, too:
1) Be in tune with my body and intuition. Slow down and listen, feel what would be the best for me now (to stretch? To go for a walk? To answer urgent emails?). Nourish my body, not destroy it through my food & lifestyle choices or thoughts & words. Meditate and do yoga each morning. Read a chapter of good book during the day. Spend time outside. Drink plenty of water.
2) Build something of meaning. Make time for things I crave doing, that makes me grow. Limit time on social media or unplanned internet surfing. Dream big and achieve a lot.
3) Try new things, learn, be inspired, grateful. Not only gather knowledge, but implement it.
4) Continue with mastering the art of manifestation :) I guess some day I will write a separate post on this.
This has been incredibly long post, but if you’re still with me I would love to hear your thoughts- how do YOU want to feel this year? What are your goals, big or small? Let’s share and support each other :)